Expat Robinson Crusoe Syndrome

Expat Robinson Crusoe Syndrome

(*Thanks for the compliments on my photography. Apart from memes and PRC propaganda, all photos are mine.)

"Will you walk into my parlour?" said the spider to the fly. No, this photo has nothing to do with the topic. Talk to the fangs.

One of my favorite phrases used to describe expat behaviour is Robinson Crusoe Syndrome. I first saw it in an old-school travel book about Taiwan. It describes how some western expats seem to view themselves as some sort of castaways on an exotic land, meeting exotic men and women Fridays and having experiences only they can relate to others.

Yes, some expats act as if they are on an exotic adventure to an exotic land with exotic primitive people who only they can decipher. In reality, Taiwan is a destination for thousands of western expats. Many have been here for decades. Taiwanese themselves are a modern, technologically savvy people and Taiwan has to be one of the easiest countries in Asia to live in as a western expat.  So who or what are these Crusoe crusaders? I’ll list a few.

Avoid eye contact at all costs loner. 

This one is somewhat self-explanatory and has been commented on extensively in expat circles and online forums. He is a western expat who, upon seeing another western expat on the street, noticeably avoids eye contact, looks away and sometimes even crosses the street or changes direction to avoid having to meet another expat. It’s as if he doesn’t want his exotic island experience bubble burst by accidental, occidental contact.

Self-appointed expat representative. 

This type fashions himself as a makeshift consular employee—for all nationalities of western expat, though no one appointed him to such a position. This person believes that he has his finger on the pulse of what is going on in the expat world here. He acts as if he knows or has contact with virtually all expats on the island and that he can speak on behalf of us as a group. Whenever something happens to an expat, he tries to get involved, regardless of whether he knows the person or not. He’s also known as the well-meaning nosy busybody foreigner. Also may be admin for expat forums or FB groups and always claims to represent "the community."

No pictures of expats, I'm afraid. But here's an expat business for sale. 500k NT only. I'm giving it away! Inquire within.

Self-important whiner/ you can’t do that here complainer. 

This one will tell you western expats are oppressed in any undertaking in Taiwan. He will tell you no foreigner has ever been given a credit card, ditto for mortgages. To this type, Taiwan is horrible because it won’t allow him to naturalize without renouncing his current citizenship. It’s also an apparent a human rights abuse that Taiwan has recently presented ROC nationality to some elderly priests and nuns after up to 50 years of charity work for little or no money. 5 years of teaching English for market wages surely is equivalent to a lifetime of charity, founding orphanages and such? Of course it is. 

SJW hypocrite. 

This person publicly decries white privilege, or “racist” hiring practices in TEFL teaching, but lacks the self-awareness to understand that this apparent preference for white North Americans is actually what gives him a job (and if you ever want to see someone triggered to the point of irrational rage, point this out to one of the SJW hypocrite types).

Macro bug says: "You need to decolonize your mind to create a new non-gender specific science"

Teacher who brought Taiwan into the modern age

This is a teacher who seemingly believes Taiwan only developed because he has been teaching in Taiwan for 20 years. Without their input, Taiwan would never have modernized. Related to self-important whiner category. This teacher believes he is an example of the "white collar experts" the government here is trying to attract in greater numbers. Absolutely feels slighted that he hasn't been offered a Plum Blossom card or citizenship yet.  

Holier-than-thou expat blog guru (ahem…). 

This type writes blog entries and op-ed pieces for local English papers (with audiences numbering well into the hundreds… of disinterested EFL learners and hungover expats). These [sarcasm] high barrier to entry, exclusive publications [/sarcasm] mean this expat’s opinions are better than yours and he is subsequently better than you. This type is known to act like he has some insider connections in government and the military. The gentlest criticism or most polite disagreement is greeted with condescension and aggression. How dare you disagree, plebe? I have a blog! A BLOG!!!

So, which one/ones are you? Are there others I missed?